AVGN the movie Review

ANGRY VIDEO GAME NERD - THE MOVIE

He's gonna take you back to the past
To play the shitty games that suck ass
He'd rather have a buffalo
Take a diarrhea dump in his ear
He'd rather eat the rotten asshole
Of a roadkilled skunk and down it with beer
He's the angriest gamer you've ever heard
He's the Angry Nintendo Nerd
He's the Angry VIDEO GAME NERD

Any UBER fans like me would know that that was actually the original NINTENDO NERD song. But that is cause with this review I am going to really delve deep into this and show exactly my thoughts and feelings from beginning to end. So grab a poncho and say a prayer cause this jizz is about to hit the fan, then fly off into Shawn's mother's eye... Sean's name has been changed to protect the dignity of his mother's. Poor Ms. Carasca.

I was parusing the shelves of youtube's best and brightest accidental stars as I came across a video that involved a young boy, around the age of eight sticking an old snes (SUPER NINTENDO) cartridge up his sleeping brother's butt. Now both of these kids seem to really be committed to this game in rectum goal as they motivated one another along the way telling each other how good it could be and how much more is left of the cartridge (EACH update seemed to abigously suprise and threaten the anally full boy). So at the end of this video the cartridge did make it in and the two boys highfived each other as the full child turned around to the camera plopping down and screamed bloody murder "Get it out! Get it out!" The video ended and to my dismay I felt rather unsatisfied from the outcome and decided to find another film. Then in the related box to the side I noticed a rather familiar face. ROLF!

This wasn't the ROLF I came to know for so many years. No it was a fearful worried ROLF. Now Rolf I came to know as the ANGRY VIDEO GAME NERD - or AVGN. He and I went through many years together, he reviewing games and me watching from my computer screen laughing away with tissues and pizza. He entertained me for over a decade and now I see him looking quite alarmed with a giant fireball coming his way! And below his image came words that will stick with me for all eternity, at least until I finish the review - "AVGN _ THE MOVIE"

So with excitement screaming in my veins I quickly ran to my chalk board and erased anything I had planned for my day and stripped down into my AVGN under shorts, they look great on me. Trust me on this.

The movie was clicked... purchased off YOUTUBE! Which I did not

know was possible... if I knew I could do that I would have just

told those kids with the SNES cartridge to try charging a dollar

per view. HOSPITAL BILLS... man... KILLER.

Currently my life has found a purpose and It was here in this chair

in my shorts and in pure nerd gasm bliss. The intro came on and

boom I was beyond blown away ... this was going to be like me

sitting ten feet from Jennifer Love Hewit that time she tripped and

fell on a midget. I assume he tried catching her but I think the intentions were miss judged as he ended up

putting his hands up and braced the only things in his vision and that was her falling pillows. He embraced them

with some might as she was not even falling towards him but to the side of him. SO now his attempts were just

in vain and her body guard ended up punting the little man away with a side shove of his massive six foot eight

320lbs body and hip.

Poor guy... He was just reaching for something that would have always been out of his reach. But he did get to taste some kind of greatness. He touched his goal. Just couldnt get everything he desired.

The movie starts off with a boom, wam, pow, kathunk, and then it starts dribbling off into Made for TV movie Disney channel type feel. But then the main girl dressed up like a nerd started to steal the show. She mossyed over in a NERD VAN and red hair and glasses and instantly I felt something I dont think is common. Was it love...

no not even close, was it attraction? No... Was it lust? Nope everything was wrong there... it was severe depression... Because here this pretty girl nerd is going to over shadow the LEGENDARY ROLF and I knew there

has to be a non existant sex scene but made to seem like a sex scene is going to happen mainly cause she is

far too attractive not to pencil one in...

JUST LOOK !